Thursday, June 23, 2011

A special place in Hell...

Okay... listen up, gang.

There are many people out there who do their damndest to make life hard for the rest of us. Whether it's through willful design, ignorance or pig-headed stupidity. You know the folks I mean... Those who park their shopping carts right in the middle of the aisle so that nobody can get through from either side, those who park their cars in the middle of a goddamn crosswalk or at the entrance to your driveway, the list goes on...

But I have to tell you that there exists a particular brand of socially-retarded dimwit out there, for whom there must surely exist a very special place in Hades (assuming that this fictional place were actually to exist). I'm talking about those hordes of walking sphincters (for there are many...), who rather than return their shopping carts to the outside corrals or to the front of the store, park them in the HANDICAPPED PARKING SPOTS!!!!!!

It is doubtless that you disingenuous, empty-headed, moronic fucks know full well who you are. What the fuck can possibly be going through your head, that you would do something so mindlessly fucking stupid? Were your parents related? Were you the defective sibling that should have been eaten at birth? Do you frequently attend family gatherings in the hopes of meeting a mate? What gives???

How fucking callous, unthinking and lazy are you, that you cannot walk the extra 10 feet across the roadway to dispose of the cart properly? To say nothing of the fact that you then expect someone of diminished physical capabilities to move your fucking cart for your lousy, socially-disposable carcass, before they can park their vehicle!!

So here it is... Fair warning!  If I ever catch anyone doing this within my field of vision, physically diminished capabilities or not, I will take my cane and fucking beat you to death where you stand. Then I will impale you with said "Handicapped Parking Only" sign and leave you there like a grotesque scarecrow, so that your shell of a being might serve as a reminder to those other like-minded droids.

Um-mmm... not to put too fine of a point on it.

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